Since it is Thanksgiving week, I planned to write about being thankful. After all, there is much to appreciate, especially if we have our health. However, while gratitude normally comes easily to me, I also found myself feeling grumpy. Weary. Out-of-sorts. Sad about missing simple things like a friendly hug or a dinner out.

It is normal and human to experience this mixed bag of emotions right now, especially when we combine the holidays with a global pandemic. Instead of giving ourselves a pep talk, I have a different suggestion: try some self-compassion.

Why Self-Compassion?

Self-compassion helps us treat ourselves with the same kindness and caring as we would show to others. If a friend said, "I am so sick of all these restrictions and not being able to go out," you would never say, "Oh, just get over it and be happy for what you've got." Never! Yet that is what we tell ourselves, hoping to shore up our emotions with a stiff upper lip. The problem is, it doesn't work. We end up judging and criticizing ourselves, feeling worse as a result.

Self Compassion in Practice

The idea of self compassion is simple, but putting it into practice isn't. Dr. Kristen Neff, author of Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself, says the first step is mindfulness.

The Top Takeaway

Try an experiment this week. Become aware of the times when the self-critic in you starts to act up. Don't try to suppress it or ignore it. Just acknowledge it, but with the same kindness that you would show to a friend.